Sunday, December 21, 2003

What's In A Name?

After screaming my lungs out at the bank moron named Jason recently for screwing up my stuff, I was none too estatic when introduced to a new colleague who's name is also, you guess it, Jason. Not 5 minutes after he walked off that a supplier dropped by in the office and his name is also Jason. What's the matter with you people?! Can't you be more creative? Take a cue from the Red Indians.

My hatred for Jason Number 1 prompted me to think what made him choose that name in the first place. You see, he wasnt born as a Jason. His birth-given name was probably something like Siah Chun Choi or something equally dumb. Malaysians, particularly the Chinese have a fondness for giving themselves English names to add on to their existing ones. Supposedly to aid people in recalling their names. Yea right. When people are rattling off names like Samwise Gamgee, Arwen Undomiel and Aragorn like they're their next-of-kin, I seriously doubt that. Why not just name your kids after them? Fill the kindergarten playgrounds with the twins Lee Gim Lee and Lee Goh Las, their cousin Urukhai Wong and their neighbours Saruman Mohd Sauron and Smeagol a/l Balrog.

I ran into this guy whom I used to know to be Michael but lo and behold, it is Valen Lee now as printed on his name card. A little baffling explanation later and it turned out that he thinks Michael is too common and chanced upon the name Valentino. Alas, Valentino is a bit too long so he shorterned it to Valen. Last I heard, Michael or Valen (or maybe Don Juan by now) is being sort after by certain people for being the last man this side of Earth who still has "Tung Chee Niu" (virgin boy's urine).

So excuse me while I go headbutt my colleague who happens to go by the name Handsome.