Tuesday, October 19, 2004

My First Major Automobile Accident

Date :: Friday, 15th October 2004

Time :: 8:15AM
Venue :: Silk Highway, Kajang

I was cruising along at about 120km/h on a straight stretch of road on the fastlane when all of a sudden my steering wheel turned to the left on its own in my very hands. It was very freaky! Almost like someone else driving the car for me! I tried to brake but it was too late to avoid a collision with a Toyota Camry in the middle lane. Sorry buddy. Just wasn't your day, or mine either for that matter. *sniggers*

I tried to slow down after the collision and move the steering wheel back to the original position but it was just totally out of control. My car swerved left and right on the highway bumping me along in it until it actually flipped over on its right side. Luckily for me, it flipped back and managed to stop in time when I pulled the handbrake else I'd be one with the wall divider now. Sounds just like the car chase scenes in the movies ya? Go me!

I was stunned when the accident happened and I couldn't get out from the car as the door was jammed. I was just sitting there calmly calling for help though my hands were shaking. A police patrol car happened to be behind the Camry and they saw the whole thing. One of the man in blue had to help me out by yanking the door free. What a rollercoaster ride to start off the weekend...

Time :: 10:00AM
Venue :: Kajang Police Station

Finished lodging my police report and was about to rattled on about what happened earlier for the hundreth time that day to the police sergeant when all of a sudden I was blown away with "Do you have a boyfriend?" from the guy from my insurance company's panel workshop who had followed me to the station and again with "Are you married?" from the sergeant. My exact retort was, "Does it have anything to do with the accident case whether I have a boyfriend or not or whether I am married? Do I get a compound for it if I'm attached and get away scot free if I am not?". That helped us get down to business.

Time :: 11:00AM
Venue :: Car workshop, Balakong

Bid farewell to my beloved ride which is being towed there and will be there for the next 2-3 weeks or so for a total makeover. Front left and right bumper are goners, oil's leaking out from the gearbox, driver side window and small right side back window are totally smashed with some pieces of them stucked to my legs, right side rear mirror is in powder form while the entire right side of the car is totally scratched from when the car turned on its side earlier.

Time :: 1:00PM
Venue :: Kajang Medical Centre

Sat there in pain looking at 4 big ass fish sucking in pebbles from the bottom of their aquarium and then spitting them out over and over again for an hour while waiting for the doctor to come back from his lunch, probably at the next door 'mamak' stall trying to sound more inteligent than he really is as he tried to make the waiters addressed him as 'loctor' and making sure it's within earshot of every fucking fly buzzing around. If I thought I was going to die or be badly injured while I was being bumped around in the car earlier, I really wish I'd just drop dead then. If it helps, I was already bloodied at some places.

Thursday, October 07, 2004

When It Rains, It Pours

A few months ago, i broke up with my boyfriend of 3 years plus on the night of my very first day at work at a new job which I really like. As if coping with a breakup is not hard enough in a new workplace in a new environment with new workmates, people around me are just bent on pissing me off left, right and center! Grrr!

My new company asked me to open a bank account with this particular bank so they could bank in my salary there and I found out that this bank has service centers in shopping malls which open till night time. Therefore, I trotted off to one of the bank's service center in a mall I pass by on my way home. As luck would have it, the mall's carpark was full to the brim that evening. I had to round the carpark for about a dozen times before I found a spot.

So there I was storming my way into the bank. Got the papers, filled them up and dutifully took to the queue to have my bank account opened up. When it was my turn, the clerk told me that I can't open an account there because I neither work or live in that area. According to them, I have to open the account at a branch nearby my office or my house. It's a new stupid rule, so I noticed.

Nevermind, the following Monday, this hothead headed off to another service center nearby my office only to discover their printer not working. The guy even had the cheek to tell me that the technician had been trying to fix the damn thing since morning. And not just one but both the service center's printers are out meaning they can't open the bank account for me cause they can't print the passbook for me. Just my luck. Super!

Since I was there anyway, I asked the guy to check on the various forms his colleagues at the other service center had me filled up. Here comes the best part. He takes one look at the various papers, turned to his colleague and asked him, 'Hey, have you seen these before?'. He then told me that some of the forms I had filled up earlier was unneccessary and that I have to fill up some 'other' forms! Arrghhh! I nearly self-combust when I heard that. You mean you had me filling up all those useless, needless forms and your fucking bank's service centers don't even practise the same standard forms? Excellent!

As I was driving my car out from the mall's carpark later, I turned into this one way lane and this woman in a continental car was going the wrong way. Pissed off as I was then, I was actually nice enough to reverse to let her through and guess what I got in return? As this stupid Indian bitch passed my car, she stoppped, turned to look at me and showed me 'The Hand'! It's the same signal one gives to say 'poodah' or 'get lost' in Tamil. At that point in time, I totally snapped. The nerve of her! I swear if I wasn't so dumbfounded at how rude she was, I would have dragged her out of her car and shoved a rusty pipe up her stinking arse!!!

I was positively seething with anger then only to discover that I forgot to pay for the parking ticket at the machine and I had to park my car, get down and walk all the way to the machine only to have the machine eat my money! I had to pay 2 bucks for a 1 buck parking ticket. In my rage, I must have kicked and screamed at the machine. I don't even give a damn who might looking at me anymore.

The remainder of the day saw me picking up a call from a friend whom I had not heard from for ages who just had the honor of hearing me spew out profanities into the phone so fast and furious he was rendered speechless as I finally made my way out of the blasted carpark all ready to mow down anyone and anything who dares to slow me down on my way home. I'm surprised I didn't leave behind a trail of dead bodies and mangled cars on the highway that day. It would have been a very sweet consolation.

Last but not least, as the icing on the cake, I discovered that 4 of my bras were stolen and probably the same perverted sick mind also own the hands that deliberately cut my panties and thongs which were left outside the apartment to dry with scissors. Don't you just envy my life?