Thursday, March 09, 2006

Naked Truth or Blinding Balderdash?

Ever since my boyfriend popped "THE" question, we have been busying ourselves with the wedding plans. After the elders were properly informed, we had to choose the big date to walk down the aisle. I've never been the tradional or superstitious type but the elders insisted that we have our wedding date chosen by a fortune teller or someone like that. Images of a certain Feng Shui master and her toadly appearance immediately pop to mind and I shuddered.

So, one fine Saturday morning, we happily trotted off to see the 'Sifu'. I learnt that it had been hard to get the appointment that day as apparently, this is one very much sought-after man. The office was dark, air-conditioned and rather crammed. Not because the space is too small but because there was quite a queue while the phones were ringing off the hook! Whoever said you have to get a Degree to get a good paying job?

There were about 3-4 girls sitting at the reception area. I assumed they were his secretaries as they were the ones arranging the time for the meeting, getting the initial information about you, etc. Business was brisk all morning with all sorts of people seeking him for help on what to name their newborn babies, choosing the date for the grand opening of a new business, etc for a fee. Can't anyone decide anything on their own anymore? He ain't cheap too.

Anyway, we waited a while before being allowed to meet the guy. As it turns out, we didn't even get to meet him but only his son. Sonny spoke at bullet-train speed explaining to us something which I do not completely comprehend given my poor command of Chinese while gesturing at the Excel sheets that he had prepared. Wow, I didn't expect Junior to be so err, advanced.

Whatever happened to good old Chinese Ah Peks (old men in Hokkien) who sit under the tree and read your fortune while thoughtfully stroking his long beard? What's that you say? Who's facing extinction? No wonder Fat Blond Toad and her sorts are doing so well.

Friday, March 03, 2006

Top 10 Signs Your Boss is Out to Get You

10. It's 12.30pm and you were about to leave the office for lunch with a hot date when your Boss gives you a new assignment and and the deadline is 3pm. You missed lunch. And the hot date.

9. Boss suggests to go to a pricey, high-end restaurant for lunch and it is not a treat. Luckily you just visited the ATM.

8. It's Friday night and you are pulling in an overtime when the Boss gives you a bunch of new work that would take you days to finish and demands to have them in 3 hours. You worked through the night and came back on Saturday and stayed till 7pm. You missed Friday's dinner and Saturday's lunch. And you were sick with flu all the while.

7. Boss chides you for the smallest oversight on the morning of the first day of a major public holiday over the work done from the week before.

6. Boss displayed utter dislike and comtempt if you ever revealed that you hold your family dearer than work. You held your silence but secretly wished you were home now instead of slaving away like the lowly-paid and overworked minion that you are.

5. Boss made you sit through a meeting that lasted for 4 and 1/2 hours where no conclusion was derived but plenty of gossips and inane jokes that made you roll your eyes. You also missed dinner. And you suffer from gastric.

4. Boss then announced dislike and disrespect for people who waste time during meeting by doing nothing but dishing out plenty of gossips and inane jokes.

3. Boss said to do A and when you delivered the A, the boss turns around and barks at you for not delivering B. You get scolded again when you try to explain because the Boss is always right and you are always wrong, Wrong, WRONG!

2. Boss never talks to you unless to give you more work or to chide you more but she does talk bad about you behind your back. You spent your time trying to stay out of Boss's gossip radar.

1. Boss often "jeling" (look and quickly look away) at you in disgust. You grit your teeth.

DISCLAIMER: These are purely my opinions only and any resemblance to any Bosses living or dead is purely unintentional and coincidental.

p/s: On second thoughts, if you are anything like the Boss above then you ought to just go and hang yourself for being such a bastard/bitch that you are.

Wednesday, March 01, 2006

Humiliated in Sunway Pyramid Part II

Following the incident last Saturday where my fiancé and I were very rudely told to leave the Sunway Pyramid premises just because my fiancé had his arm over my shoulder, I've taken the liberty to create the below traffic sign for Sunway Pyramid. I wonder if they will implement it.