Thursday, July 22, 2010

A Management Story

I'm angry, really freaking pissed off here. Why? Let me tell you why! I'm just about to inherit ALL the work from yet another colleague who's leaving the company by middle of this month. This is the 3rd colleague whose work had been passed to me prior to them leaving the company! So in addition to my own work, I will be doing the work of 4 persons soon with the puny salary of 1!!!

One of them is even a holding a manager level position while I'm just a lowly-paid minion but I get to inherit his work as well. Great! I can't even take half a day off without my office mailbox exploding. What the hell is wrong with you people! I'd tell you what's wrong. It's the stupid management I'm working for. Actually it's just one person, someone who shall here forth be known only as Fugly.

I've introduced Fugly without a name previously in the posting "Lord, help me please!" and more recently in "http://schweeney.blogspot.com/2007/03/blog-post.html". In case you are wondering, Fugly stands for Fucking Ugly. Now for the rest of you who also happens to have the misfortune of reporting to a person who is as full of shit as Fugly, I can only offer you this humourous piece of insight I received off the net. Read on and have a laugh. Stress kills, I know. How sad.

Story # 1

It's a fine sunny day in the forest and a lion is sitting outside his cave, lying lazily in the sun. Along comes a fox, out on a walk.

Fox: "Do you know the time, because my watch is broken"

Lion: "Oh, I can easily fix the watch for you"

Fox: "Hmm... But it's a very complicated mechanism, and your big claws will only destroy it even more"

Lion: "Oh no, give it to me, and it will be fixed"

Fox: "That's ridiculous! Any fool knows that lazy lions with great claws cannot fix complicated watches"

Lion: "Sure they do, give it to me and it will be fixed"

The lion disappears into his cave, and after a while he comes back with the watch which is running perfectly. The fox is impressed, and the lion continues to lie lazily in the sun, looking very pleased with himself.

Soon a wolf comes along and stops to watch the lazy lion in the sun.

Wolf: "Can I come and watch TV tonight with you, because mine is broken"

Lion: "Oh, I can easily fix your TV for you"Wolf: "You don't expect me to believe such rubbish, do you? There is no way that a lazy lion with big claws can fix a complicated TV“

Lion: "No problem. Do you want to try it?"

The lion goes into his cave, and after a while comes back with a perfectly fixed TV. The wolf goes away happily and amazed.

Scene : Inside the lion's cave. In one corner are half a dozen small and intelligent looking rabbits who are busily doing very complicated work with very detailed instruments. In the other corner lies a huge lion looking very pleased with himself.

Moral : IF YOU WANT TO KNOW WHY A MANAGER IS FAMOUS; LOOK AT THE WORK OF HIS SUBORDINATES.

Management Lesson
In the context of the working world
IF YOU WANT TO KNOW WHY SOMEONE UNDESERVED IS PROMOTED; LOOK AT THE WORK OF HIS SUBORDINATES.

Story # 2

It's a fine sunny day in the forest and a rabbit is sitting outside his burrow, tippy-tapping on his typewriter. Along comes a fox, out for a walk.

Fox: "What are you working on?"
Rabbit: "My thesis."
Fox: "Hmm... What is it about?"
Rabbit: "Oh, I'm writing about how rabbits eat foxes."

Fox: "That's ridiculous ! Any fool knows that rabbits don't eat foxes!"

Rabbit: "Come with me and I'll show you!"

They both disappear into the rabbit's burrow. After few minutes, gnawing on a fox bone, the rabbit returns to his typewriter and resumes typing.

Soon a wolf comes along and stops to watch the hardworking rabbit.

Wolf: "What's that you are writing?"
Rabbit: "I'm doing a thesis on how rabbits eat wolves."

Wolf: "you don't expect to get such rubbish published, do you?"

Rabbit: "No problem. Do you want to see why?"

The rabbit and the wolf go into the burrow and again the rabbit returns by himself, after a few minutes, and goes back to typing.

Finally a bear comes along and asks, "What are you doing?

Rabbit: "I'm doing a thesis on how rabbits eat bears."

Bear: "Well that's absurd ! "

Rabbit: "Come into my home and I'll show you"

Scene : As they enter the burrow, the rabbit introduces the bear to the lion.

Moral : IT DOESN'T MATTER HOW SILLY YOUR THESIS TOPIC IS; WHAT MATTERS IS WHOM YOU HAVE AS A SUPERVISOR.

Management Lesson
In the context of the working world:

IT DOESN'T MATTER HOW BAD YOUR PERFORMANCE IS; WHAT MATTERS IS WHETHER YOUR BOSS LIKES YOU OR NOT.

4 comments:

zewt said...

so it's true huh... you will only blog when u have something to rant about. well.... i have been blogging a lot about work lately... it's certainly stupid of us to contantly succumb ourselves to this modern slavery. but we just refuse to get out right? yeah, we are all stuck. we need to pay bills.

your finaly word is damn right... it all depends on your boss... sigh. dont work too hard... it might get you killed... and i am not kidding.

Schweeney said...

Hi zewt! Whattodo? I need an outlet to express my frustation. I mean, look at me, I'm still here at work at 8.25pm. Work landed on my lap at 7pm. How not to be stressed out?

Will said...

wow... so bad huh...

take care and catch up with you when i see you online :)

zewt said...

which is why i have been blogging a lot about us modern slaves... i hope everyone who reads my blog will slowly realise we should stop succumbing ourselves to such slavery...