Friday, December 29, 2006

Britney Fed Up With K-Fed

Hey, my posting title rhymes!

Anyway, today I'm just going to share with you another hilarious article I read. I forgot where it came from but it is SO sarcastic funny I just had to share it. I read it yesterday and it's still hilarious when I read it now. So here goes, enjoy.



Blame K-Fed's soaring success for Britney split

Wannabe rapper can now sell his CDs out of the trunk of his Ferrari

The story of “A Star Is Born” is by now familiar. A husband and wife in show business struggle to keep their union strong despite the fact that one of them finds fame and fortune while the other endures only heartache and disappointment. The most serious casualty in such a relationship isn’t a broken dream; it’s everlasting love.

I couldn’t help but gravitate toward the “A Star Is Born” model when the news broke that Britney Spears and hubby Kevin Federline are calling it quits. Obviously, the strain of astounding success juxtaposed against pathetic failure proved to be too much. Obviously, Britney just couldn’t deal with K-Fed’s meteoric rise into hip-hop royalty.

It must be brutal for Brit. One moment he’s lying around the mansion with his entourage siphoning her funds while trying to think of words that rhyme with “prenup,” then suddenly it’s all gone. No more insipid heart-to-hearts. No more unexplained late-night absences. No more pleas for career boosts. Just a big black hole where his love had been.

K-Fed’s status in the entertainment business has been massively misinterpreted, and, in turn, this breakup will appear to the unenlightened as Britney getting fed up with K-Fed.

Sure, he was booed recently during a brief appearance at the annual Halloween Carnival in West Hollywood. And he was booed at an appearance during a World Wrestling Entertainment match in L.A. And he reportedly had to plead to keep organizers from canceling a concert in a New York City club after only 300 people showed up in a room that holds 1,500. And shows at the House of Blues in Cleveland and Atlantic City were cancelled. And many in the hip-hop community reacted with derision and scorn after K-Fed performed at the Teen Choice Awards, including XXL magazine editor-in-chief Elliot Wilson, who said: “He doesn’t get that he’s Britney’s man and it’s hard to take him seriously.”

Also, there is his new CD, “Playing With Fire,” in which he raps about climbing out of obscurity in Fresno to enjoy a life of privilege and wealth as Britney’s husband. Rolling Stone’s Kevin O’Donnell called it “reprehensible,” while Entertainment Weekly’s Chris Willman gave it a grade of “F” and Stephen Thomas Erlewine of All Music Guide said, “It’s also a bore because he’s a boor.”

All of that is just jealousy. K-Fed has, above all else, street cred. The street in question might be Rodeo Drive, but still. People make such a big deal out of the fact that 50 Cent has been shot nine times. Try being K-Fed for a day. Try loading a day’s worth of shopping and 11 slacker buddies into one Rolls-Royce Phantom and then come talk to me about street cred.

Our finest hip-hop artists are where they are because they draw upon challenging life experiences and harrowing close calls to inspire their music. This is K-Fed all over. He’s a poster boy for adversity. For instance, recently he told Entertainment Weekly: “I used to be embarrassed to go to the store and buy tampons, but that’s all past tense. Once you make it through that, then you’re good.”

It’s possible that quote was taken out of context, but I don’t recall him saying that he was buying the tampons for Britney. If he wasn’t, if he was just buying them, then he is truly facing more hardship than any man should bear. Somewhere in that tragic situation is a song that, despite threats of more ridicule, demands to be written and performed before a sparse audience.

Britney made a recent appearance on “Late Night With David Letterman” and looked good. She had a sassy new blond hairdo and was clad in an enticing black dress. It was only a staged cameo, a mere morsel of celebrity banter, but it gave her an opportunity to meet the public during this trying time. The folks in Dave’s audience responded favorably, bathing her in applause.

But she obviously is hurting. Reminders are everywhere. Whenever she sees a married couple sitting together in a restaurant, she’ll immediately think of Kevin, especially if the guy is making the woman pick up the check. When she attends one of the major music awards shows, she’ll hobnob with fellow superstars backstage and long for the days when Kevin was beside her, asking her for 20 bucks for cigarettes.

Thursday, December 28, 2006

Funniest Article of 2006

The article is taken from The Star Online's website on 28 Dec 06.


KUALA LUMPUR: One group that has been badly hit by the disruption of Internet access is the blogger community.

Most bloggers using overseas-based servers like Friendster, Xanga and MySpace have found it difficult to access their weblogs.

Blogger Joyce Wong said she only managed to upload a few sentences onto her blog.

“It is really getting to me because I have all my information and contacts online and I cannot get my work done,” said Wong, who is known as KinkyBlueFairy online.

For radio deejay cum music producer Johan Farid Khairuddin, the inability to post his blog meant that he has been disconnected from his fans. “I blog very frequently – every five minutes if I may say so – and this breakdown has affected me emotionally as I am unable to interact with others,” said the 26-year-old.

Student Adrian Teh, 22, who blogs and reads his friends' posts regularly, said he felt hopeless.

Tech and gadgets blogger Albert Ng said he was not affected by the disruption because his weblog was in a local server. However, he has had difficulties going to his friends' blogs as well as international e-mail sites.

Noor Faridah Zulkiflie was planning to revert to paper and pen since she was unable to post her blogs online. “I feel wretched now because I have lots of pent-up feelings but unfortunately cannot write about them,” said the 22-year-old student.


OK OK, so some part of the Internet was down yesterday but for the life of me I just cannot make the connection between that and using words like 'deprived', 'hopeless' and 'wretched' to describe one's feeling of being unable to blog for less than a day.

Seriously, why is our national newspaper compelled to publish this story is beyond me. Not that all news should be the serious, doom and gloom kind though. Aah, I get it. Must be for its entertainment value. I laughed my heart out reading the article above while drinking my coffee this morning. What a great way to start the day.

Sure blogging is fun but feeling deprived, hopeless and wretched just because you can write online? Get a life! And what's with blogging every 5 minutes? That's not blogging, that's just crazy! 10:05 Drinking coffee, 10:10 Peeing the coffee I just drank, 10:15 Checking emails, 10:20 Just breathing...

Is this article for real or what?

Monday, December 18, 2006

Lord, help me please!

Now let me just tell you that I'm all for freedom in choosing one's religion and I have nothing against any other religion other than my own. So, that is why it irks me so much that a certain person I know had been trying to convert me and my friends to Christianity against our wishes.

Example of things the zealot had done:

1) Trying to get more people from her religion to join our group so that effort can be stepped up to convert the rest of us. I'm not making this up, she actually declared this out loud.

2) Suggested putting up posters of her idol, Jesus Christ, all around a common area shared by multi-racial people.

3) Chided me for wearing low-cut jeans and spaghetti strap because her pastor would definitely not approve of it in church. Excuse me, hello, I DON'T attend your church, woman! Bah!

4) Made us listen to her talks on Christianity for hours on end, sometimes forcing us to our skip lunches/dinners for it.
And the list goes on...

Now I know there are bound to be Christians reading this, so enlighten me please. Help me understand why is there a need for her to convert the rest of us so vigorously? Whatever happened to respecting the religion of others and freedom of choice?

Monday, November 20, 2006

Pouty Blonde Bond Rocks The Casino!


OK, so my first reaction to Daniel Craig as the new Bond is "UGH!". He's so blonde and what's with the pouting of the thin lips anyway? So after reading much good reviews on Casino Royale only did I decide to check him out.


I must say I kinda like this new Bond. He's so much more violent than when Pierce Brosnan was at the helm and SO sarcastically funny that I am mortified to tell you that I enjoyed the torture scene tremendously! For the benefit of those who has yet to watch the movie, let's just say it involves a very painful scene involving the male reproductive system. Am I sick? Nah!


However, I'm less than err, inspired by the much hyped-about Bond-out-of-the-water scene. I wonder if that only affects newlyweds but nothing stirred in me as he emerged from the water. I didn't hear any gasps from the audience near me nor even a sigh. In fact, I think I stifled a yawn right about that time.


Now don't get me wrong. The movie is good. Maybe a tad long for me to sit through at 2 and a half hours but the final verdict is, he did a damn decent job. More action, more thrill, more violence, more rawness and more pouting.

Say 'YES' to the blondie Bond!

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

I'm Back! And Married!

Howdy mate! Guess what? I'm back after my honeymoon in Australia! As some of you might already know, I got married last month to the most wonderful man. *winks*


I was actually near nervous breakdown-point during the last couple of weeks before the wedding. So many little details to look into and so little time. On top of that, I had to wrap up all my stuff at work so that I can pass over my workload smoothly to this sweet young boy who just joined my department to hold the turf while I go koala-hugging. Needless to say, my plans to get a good night's sleep the night before the big day never materialized.

I barely had 4 hours of sleep before I woke up for my make-up session early in the morning. Family and friends started arriving and I was busy posing for the camera. All hell broke loose when the groom and his heng tais (close male friends) arrived. My chee muis (close female friends) and the heng tais made such a commotion but from my seat in my bedroom, I can hear that my chee muis were all having so much fun ragging the groom and the heng tais. Wish I was out there myself! Kudos to hubby and the heng tais for being so sporting and fun. You guys get 2 thumbs up from my chee muis for your 'performances' that day.

After a string of tea ceremonies at my house and again at hubby's place, it was time again to get me ready for the night's reception at the restaurant. Boy, I barely had enough time to grab some lunch and bathe before my make-up artist knocked on my door again. At the dinner, I was too busy to even eat! I remember a few spoonful of shark fins' soup and a bite of the fish and that's about it. Entertaining 600 people at one go is one tough job to tackle. Gosh, were we relieved when it was all over.



The next few weeks after that are the best times I've ever had in my life. All those carefree days of waking up late in each other arms with nought a worry in the world is pure bliss. We enjoyed our honeymoon in Australia tremendously. However, I'd leave my travel stories in Sydney and Melbourne for another posting.

I've got to go off early now as I'm learning how to cook! Me -> cook! Stop looking so shocked, people. You disgust me! :P

Friday, July 28, 2006

Buggers and Boogers

I've been taking the trains to work for the past year and I must say, the train can be a rather disgusting place.


Just the other day, a middle-aged couple boarded the train and took the seats a few feet away from me. They look like nice folks on their way to work. I was about to doze off when I noticed the most yucky thing a guy can do. The man started to dig his nose with gusto. I tried to shut my eyes to erase the horrendous image but it was no use. When I opened my eyes again, he was trying to flick off his 'golden nugget' from his finger. Not one flick but a few times! At that moment, I had to thank God that I was not seated directly opposite him. Imagine the sticky little bugger landing on my shoes or clothes. Eew!


He then proceeded to take out his mobile phone from his pocket and was busy pressing the buttons. I wouldn't borrow his mobile if it were the last piece of working communication device and I'm lost on a deserted island with James Blunt and Sean Paul (read here to find out why I hate them). I'm surprised the wife didn't hit him or something. If I'm here, I'd have divorced him! How's that for drastic measure?

Then how about those with nose hair sticking out for all their hairy glory? My fiance and I had the misfortune of meeting with a videographer whose nose hair was so prominently disguised as moustache it was unbelievable their didn't make their way into Ripley's. Though he quoted us the best price among all the videographers we've met, I told my fiancé to politely decline and we went with a higher-priced videographer as I do not have a wish to be photograped squirming during my wedding day. 'nuff said.

I need Dettol. For my eyes!

Friday, July 28, 2006

You're Pitiful, James Blunt

I was reading a forum the other day and a topic caught my eye. Something about songs that annoy the hell out of them the most and boy oh boy, do I have a long list or what? Here are my current top annoyances:


10) L.O.V.E - Ashlee Simpson

9) Old Newspaper - Jason Lo

8) Stars Are Blind - Paris Hilton

7) Check On It - Beyonce

6) Maneater - Nelly Furtado

5) Temperature - Sean Paul

4) We Be Burnin' - Sean Paul

3) High - James Blunt

2) Goodbye My Lover - James Blunt


and the one that tops the list is *drum roll*


1) You're Beautiful - James Blunt

I dunno what it is about James Blunt that irritates me so much so that he fills all Top 3 spots on my hate list. It a toss between the high-pitched whining he tried to pass off poorly as singing or the fact that he looked like a damn sissy for an ex-military man. To quote a fella forummer, 'I'd like to hit James Blunt with a VERY blunt object!'. Haha! How true.


In fact, I not only can't stand his voice, I can't stand the sight of him either. The best part is, I'm not the odd one out. Many people I've asked find him irritating as well. In fact, he also topped the annoying list in the above-mentioned forum. Hate that stupid video of 'You're Beautiful', especially when he starts taking things out from his pocket. I thought the entire video is inane and it drives me insane!


This is one guy that makes my blood boil at the very sight and sound of him! Kudos to Weird Al Yankovic for his version called 'You're Pitiful'. I like that version just fine. Then there's that awful Sean Paul. Ugh! He call that mumbo-jumbo he's sputtering out as singing? Puh-lease! Don't even get me started!